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I miss what we had.

I miss being able to talk to someone constantly. I miss my phone vibrating off the table because I always hear from you. I miss having dinner with the same person the whole week but never running out of things to talk about. I miss holding someone’s hand in the car over the stick shift. I miss being with someone romantically – no judgments and no regrets, just love (bahaha).

But then, when I look at things, you’re not the same person who you used to be. You’re not the same person who told me that I was the only one for you, that I was the only one who could make you happy. You’re not the same person who I looked up to and trusted. You’re not the same person who fell in love with me and who was content with me. Because if you were content, you wouldn’t have fallen for somebody else.

And I was going to say that I missed you, but then again – you’re not exactly you anymore. Yes, I agree that people change and that they’re always allowed to change. But this person who I see now – that’s not someone I’m willing to be with or to love. I mean, I’ve been pretty sure about not being with you for a while. But I don’t know, it hasn’t hit home the way it did tonight.

A part of me will always love you, I suppose. But I don’t think I love you enough for it to matter a whole lot to you.